Successless, Inc.
I got the best piece of junkmail ever the other day. It came in one of those padded manila envelopes for some reason, which I guess means it was hand packed. The mailing label had a credit card company logo on it and it was addressed to “Owner, Successless” at my home address. Now, I use the name Successless quite a bit online, as a username and general alias in all sorts of situations, starting with the name of this blog, but it doesn’t exist as any kind of official, registered business entity outside of the domain registration database, which I’m assuming is where this company got my info (unless my registrar is actively selling my info? Hmm).
Anyways, inside was an offer for a business credit card emblazoned with my “business” name, Successless. I was half tempted to send in an application jsut for the sheer absurdity of it.
But two things about this struck me as odd, on reflection. One, the fact that it looked hand packed. The address wasn’t just entered in a database somewhere and churned out on some automated mail service. Someone presumably took the time to send me this credit come-on in a padded envelope! Which brings me to the second thing: That that someone presumably also read my “business” name and thought that a business called Successless should be extended a line of credit.
I can just picture the business plan:
- Get Line of Credit
- Max out Credit
- Default on Debts
- Die in Gutter Clutching Bottle of Screwtop Wine
…Sounds pretty successless to me.
